Whether or not you are following the marriage debate in the Supreme Court now it is interesting to see how the masculine energy has a specific agenda toward the idea of same-sex marriage and the female energy is more malleable to the concept of love between partners, and is not confused by the label that is so feared, marriage. The soul of our Constitution is crying for the lack of clarity we are expressing to its words. We are interpreting its concepts through fear and loathing. The Defense of Marriage Act and the right to Equal Rights as a human being, these are constructs of the Draconian CEOs of the human race. This holding on of old fears is the ego’s brilliant device for keeping us blind and bound. Ego is the task master of our plight here on earth, and It [Ego] is relentless in retaining its power. We could, of course, rise above this lower ego life and, like a good competitor, volley back and forth in a game of immense enjoyment. Since It is not going away, anytime soon, we could allow our egos to exist within our awakened self and lift it to our Soul’s desire for enlightened identity.
The following is an excerpt from Letters from 500 – AMEN. The face of Ego, the need for Vigilance and the mis-understanding of Discipline and its divisive nature.
“I’ve observed enough of the way ego performs by now, to know that it takes much vigilance for you humans to slip out of its grasp. I did not mean ‘vigilance’ as a pun,” you laugh softly and stare into my eyes.
“You can look at this ego problem as a ‘battle’ if you want, or you can ‘play’ with it, like a game of hide-and-seek. Either way it’s quite a challenge, I’ll admit. My unintentional ‘vigilant’ pun, of course, reveals a truth behind the human dilemma. Basically, it’s a reminder of the need to be alert and watchful of your individual evolution. Your persona is gradually being unmasked.
“Yet the ego knows all your secrets. It flows along with your consciousness everywhere you go; sometimes it seems to sleep, sometimes it jumps into an opportunity to ‘defend’ you. Your human insecurities—not trusting the unknown—leave you vulnerable, available to be defended. When you feel uncomfortable, stressed or lonely, for example, ego looks around and sees a chance to help you escape and separate your mind from the moment. It wants you to keep relying on it, rather than just accepting ‘what is’. It offers you a distancing mechanism.”
I sigh, “I know this all too well, being here in this beautiful-but-sometimes-lonesome city. There are moments when I’m delighted by just being here; and then there are others when I start to be depressed by all the challenges. I’m not all that comfortable in French, yet I insist on immersing myself in the local situation, in cafés and bistros, and in the language itself. It’s a lot of work! It always has the risk of pushing me to feel not accepted or different.”
“Precisely. That’s the role of the ego. For you, it is not a character that rises up and storms around boastfully. Yours is a more subtle stage in ego-evolution. Your persona mask is gradually growing thinner as you begin to awaken. The thinness is what enables you to notice the ego more readily, say, if it tries its more aggressive behaviors. The ego, in turn therefore, evolves and learns to become subtler. It learns from your own conscious presence, stride for stride. That’s very good in the end, because this subtlety makes the mask even thinner.
“The ego cannot win ultimately. It strives to imitate your true presence, in order to hold your attention—or perhaps to fool you. It sincerely does want to protect you and to be of service, as strange as this may seem. It desires to be more and more like the soul. It has always wanted this. In reality, consciousness is the only model it has for its behavior.
“For generations ego has been in control, while your awareness slept. But it was always unconsciously imitating consciousness. Within its limitations, defending you was the only form of assistance it could imagine. It recognized that power exists for the soul; the imitation of power is control. This was ego’s option of imitation.”
I nod and take another gulp of wine.
You continue, “Now, as your need for defenses dwindles, as you awaken to the fact that defensiveness itself is keeping you from the full blessing of awakening to the unknown Source, ego has to change. To keep pace with your expansion, the ego too has to expand; it has no choice.”
I interrupt, “An expanded ego sounds like a more dominant ego.”
“It sounds that way. And indeed the ego may dream that it will be so. But it can no longer generate enough of its old substance in the new, evolving atmosphere of consciousness. As it expands to compete with true awakening, it only grows thinner, like the surface of a balloon that is over-inflated.”
You move your hands wide apart to simulate the expansion of a balloon, then continue, “To follow this analogy, you are left with two possible outcomes: Either the balloon bursts, or it gradually deflates through the thinner membrane. If you battle the ego, as some would have you do, you create hostility and tumult; alternately, if you play with the ego, it will gradually dissolve—a much gentler approach. I advise the latter.”
I nod and exhale audibly, setting my glass on the table. “Me too. I would definitely choose that too. But I’m always nervous about not catching myself quickly enough before an ego explosion.”
“A little nervousness isn’t a bad thing. Feel it, and let it stimulate your attention. Just don’t let it feed your ego. The idea for you, and those at your stage of awakening, is to stop feeding the ego. You do this by vigilance, by continuously catching yourself and by playing instead of battling. By vigilant, I do not mean a strict disciplinary attitude. Strict discipline moves you away from awareness. Awareness is not discipline!
“Whoa. Come again.” I push back in my chair. “I thought it was. Don’t many spiritual, uh, ‘disciplines’ advise otherwise?”
“Yes, they do. This is an ancient model that worked well at earlier stages of development. And it still works for some today. But as humans begin to actually awaken—that is, when the Veil of Illusion begins to fall—you are ready for a more mature and integrated method. You are ready to allow the soul itself to move through you. This is vigilance. It is wakeful allowing and acceptance. Vigilance replaces discipline.”
You sip from your glass and continue, “Discipline is ultimately divisive; it separates you from essence. It creates a ‘structure’ that you must climb over to get to where you already are. It relies on the notion that you must learn. The root of the word, discipline, is ‘to learn’ in Latin. This practice assumes you are inadequate to grow without the imposition of additional knowledge and obedience to some external authority structure.”
“Wait. What about internal, self-discipline? That’s not an outside authority.”
You counter, “The thinking mind is what I’m talking about. It is indeed ‘outside’ from the perspective of the heart and soul. Discipline is a mental function, limited to the external world of form; it is basically a form of resistance and constraint. How can this serve your awakening? Learning happens in the mind, not in the heart. The heart lives only in the Now, where knowing exists, outside of time.
“The soul needs no learning. It only needs revealing and experiencing. This is the Apocalypse, remember—the Revealing. The mind, yes, needs discipline and learning. Any physical, form-based function requires discipline. But we are moving beyond form now, into the formless, the unknown. The mind and its needs will not serve you here. To move forward now, you must release and allow—from your heart. To attempt to discipline your heart will only defeat your intentions toward soul maturity. It will only place reliance back into the province of the ego.”
I scratch my head and look briefly around the room at other customers arriving. “But I still think of being vigilant as a form of discipline.”
“The mind will see it that way, yes. If you choose to do battle with the ego, then discipline would be right up your alley. But beware, and be aware. That alley is where ego lives; it is a dark alley, full of mistrust of the unknown. It is the passage where force wants dominance over power and freedom. ‘Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil.’ These beautiful words from the psalm, from Source itself, lead one to let go, to allow and release, not to grasp and struggle.
“Is that the ‘alley of the shadow of death’ you mean?” I laugh, rather irreverently. But you join me with a grin. I quickly add, “Sorry. Yes, that psalm is incredibly beautiful and full of grace. In fact, I’ve often thought of it as one of the greatest pieces of counsel ever written.”
You continue, “For the heart, vigilance is being alert without discipline. It is allowing the moment to guide you, while staying centered in your own deeper presence. It is relaxing and appreciating; this is the opposite of strictness and obedience. There is no force or difficulty involved. The word, vigilant, comes from Latin too, meaning ‘keep awake’. Is this difficult for the mind? Indeed it is. Awakening is not for the human mind. It is for the soul that is being born inside you, in the new species.”
Copyright ⓒ 2012 Robert Lee Potter