Beyond Condolence – The Heart’s Tender Compassion



I can’t believe that something so a part of human understanding, in the loss of a loved one, can get so muddled in its expression. One usually doesn’t go to lengths to express a condolence, whether it be awkward for the person or just a case where there are no words to express the feeling. Yet, as awkward as it may be to express yourself, there is always a sense of sadness that one has for the ones grieving, and kindness is the way to go.

Those who are empty of that understanding usually stumble in that moment. Even a smile and a touch can make the moment special because the electricity we express, through our dynamic heart, out to our touch, can lift the spirit in times of grief.

I expect many of you have seen the film, “Fierce Grace”.  It’s the documentary of Baba Ram Das’ experience after his stroke. If you haven’t seen it I highly recommend a watch. It will move you. In the meantime, I have made a selection from the film that highlights a letter written by Ram Das to two of his close followers, a couple who had recently lost their young daughter to a senseless crime. This is the highest degree of condolence. The ability to bring a deeper understanding to such a moment of despair. And yet, for those not as eloquent as Ram Das, there is always a smile and a touch.


    1. Every time I watch this piece of the film I’m moved to tears. I don’t believe anyone can watch it without a heartfelt pang of compassion ringing deep within their bones. Even the roughest of personalities have been known to surrender to this understanding. Yet, there are some, so stuck in the young Soul world of ME-ness, that they are incapable of even this instinctual awareness. Imagine that. Caught somewhere between their soul’s last animal incarnation and the early birthing of their soul’s journey into human consciousness. Also interesting are those souls that decide to journey down with them, to make sure their karmic play is enhanced, to bring greater awakening when this awakening emerges.

      We can ignore this idea of awakening, that Spirit goes it’s merry way, with no conscious injection into the world of Maya. Perhaps it’s so, though history has shown that Right Living, including the tendencies toward kindness, compassion, and selflessness have stirred the heart to greater heights, and in the end, the greatest leaders are those that recognize this divine initiative and see it through.


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